Personal post anticipating an even more personal post

I´m on a visit to the dear land I have left for a few months. And I have a confession to make: I was a bitch to all of you. In the past, I have posted a lot of stuff about my adventures at 38´000 feet, but not much touching my private adventures. Stuff about love, you know? I don´t know why, it´s just too personal. But I always knew I am leaving a lot of amazing stuff out, many posts are written but kept private and I think it´s time to let some of them out there...in the jungle. It´s not a promise, just an idea, let´s see how it goes. But today I feel like sharing.

Yesterday was a great night. Although we haven´t seen each other for almost 4 months, we´ve been writing a lot. Let´s face it, as hard as it is - things are over. But there´s something still out there. I just don´t know what.. He came straight from the airport and after taking a quick shower we met in a quiet place in the city. We ate, we drank, we talked, we laughed.  And then we went to his place. What was supposed to take just a few minutes (he just wanted to show me some pictures of his last vacation) ended up being a long night of movies, even more talking and even more laughing. Our hands touched. Our legs felt the warmth from each other. And you know that butterfly feeling you get when you´re with someone that´s not indifferent to you? I felt his edginess, on that quiet night only interrupted by the voices of the movie, I felt his shivering. I felt he was feeling something too. But I decided I wouldn´t kiss him. I could have..but then again, I can´t. Things are complicated right now. He was going to drive me home. We went down the stairs and opened the front door. And then wow!, what a romantic and unforgettable sight - unexpectedly, huge, beautiful white snow flakes were dropping from the sky. It was the first snow of the year. None of us were expecting it. And what a cold, quiet night it was! As my high heels first step the snow I had to look up. I wanted to feel the snow landing slowly on my face. I opened my arms, closed my eyes and enjoyed the moment. His worked-out body was so close, I could have seeked warmth from his strong arms and love from his soft lips. But then again.. I couldn´t. Things are too complicated right now.

This will probably make you understand the next post.